WHO Poll
Q: 2023/24 Hopes & aspirations for this season
a. As Champions of Europe there's no reason we shouldn't be pushing for a top 7 spot & a run in the Cups
24%
  
b. Last season was a trophy winning one and there's only one way to go after that, I expect a dull mid table bore fest of a season
17%
  
c. Buy some f***ing players or we're in a battle to stay up & that's as good as it gets
18%
  
d. Moyes out
37%
  
e. New season you say, woohoo time to get the new kit and wear it it to the pub for all the big games, the wags down there call me Mr West Ham
3%
  



Coffee 7:36 Sat May 6
Saturday football
CORONATION DAY FOOTBALL
God save the King


BOURNEMOUTH vs CHELSEA (1500)
Just weeks ago, the Cherries were among the favourites for relegation. They’ve done a fantastic job of turning things around and now find themselves on the cusp of survival. One more win will likely do it, if they haven’t already, and who better than Chelsea to mark that milestone? They’ve been utterly and pleasingly dreadful under Frank Jr and there’s nothing to suggest that will change on the Dorset coast. Home win.

MANCHESTER CITY vs LEEDS UNITED (1500)
City march on towards the title and nobody, not even old Big Head himself, will stop them. There’s the sense that King Sam’s coronation has come a few weeks too late for Leeds, but it will be interesting to see how he starts his brief reign against Haaland et al. Home win.

TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR vs CRYSTAL PALACE (1500)
Spurs are a club in deep disarray, a rudder with no hand on the tiller. Palace are enjoying the security of safety and will fancy some pickings from up north. Draw.

WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS vs ASTON VILLA (1500)
Wolves have sweated not a little in recent times, but they’re all but safe now. Villa, meanwhile, are striving for the Euro Conference next season. They were a point above us when they appointed Emery. Away win.

LIVERPOOL vs BRENTFORD (1730)
Liverpool have got themselves into the Europa League spot and their goal for the rest of the season is to stay there. Brentford have little left to play for, having virtually cemented ninth spot. Home win.



*SUNDAY*

NEWCASTLE UNITED vs ARSENAL (1630)
A month ago the title was in Arsenal’s hands, but they’ve gone and done a Spursy with it. The Barcodes have had one heck of a season and if they can hold off the advance of Man U they’ll end it in third spot. Should be a good game. Draw.

WEST HAM UNITED vs MANCHESTER UNITED (1900)
After today, we’ve go to Brentford before hosting Leeds then travelling to Leicester on the final day. None of them are easy games, making it all the more important to get another point at least into the bag today. Man U have their sights set on third, but will have to outperform Newcastle. They were outperformed by Brighton on Thursday night. Does that leave them as a wounded tiger in search of fresh prey or simply ready to accept fourth? Either way, it’s a vital game for both sides. A mystery illness kept four first team players out of the side that lost to Man C on Wednesday, but with luck they will have recovered and be rested for today. At home and under the lights is rarely an appealing prospect for visiting sides and we’ll have to make the most of what is usually a cracking atmosphere for this fixture. The odds will be in Man U’s favour, but perhaps we can defy them – and VAR, which may be more of a challenge – for once and take one more step towards safety. Draw.



*MONDAY*

FULHAM vs LEICESTER CITY (1500)
Fulham seem to have settled for tenth, with little room for manoeuvre up or down. This may offer some encouragement to the visitors, who remain in trouble with a couple of eminently loseable games coming up after today – before the host us on the last day. The Foxes have a better goal difference than Leeds, Forest and Everton, and that’s what might make the difference in the final reckoning. Draw.

BRIGHTON & HOVE ALBION vs EVERTON (1730)
The Seagulls have a realistic chance of qualifying for Europe and that’s a strong incentive to perform. Everton are deep, very deep, in the brown stuff and it will take something special to keep them from the drop. It’s hard to see anything but the most probable outcome at the Amex this evening. That’ll do nicely. Home win.

NOTTINGHAM FOREST vs SOUTHAMPTON (2000)
The Saints have flirted with relegation for several seasons and now they’re set to consummate that relationship. Forest are in severe danger of joining them and have to win today if they’re to stand a chance of staying up. Their home form has kept them in the running and, with Chelsea (A), Arsenal (H) and Palace (A) coming up, this is their last realistic chance of adding three points to their tally. Home win.



*CHAMPIONSHIP ROUND-UP*

When this season’s history is written, the spotlight will rightly shine on Burnley’s immediate and stylish return to the Premier League. But two other clubs also deserve a share of the limelight: Middlesboro and Coventry, who in one of those curious twists of scheduling meet on Monday.

When Michael Carrick started his first managerial appointment at Boro last October, he walked into a club languishing a point above the relegation zone having accumulated 17 points from 16 games. That’s West Ham form. His first game saw Boro fall to another defeat at Preston. But then things started to change. Turn the clock forward to the present and Boro end the season in fourth place. Whatever happens in the play-offs it’s been an astonishing season for Carrick, and Boro fans might well have witnessed the start of what could be a stellar career in some of football’s most exalted hotseats.

Coventry’s season mirrors Boro’s – you might even say that it eclipses Boro’s. They lost six of their opening eight games, which is worse than West Ham form, and didn’t register a victory until late-October, almost to the day that Michael Carrick took on his Teesside assignment. They’re guaranteed a play-off place if they avoid defeat at Boro. It’s been a really tough few years for the Sky Blues that’s seen them flirt with bankruptcy, lose their stadium, and plunge to the depths of the English professional game: five years ago, they were playing in League Two. But under the stewardship of Mark Robins, another graduate of the Sir Alex School of Management and Hairdressing, they’ve rocketed to the brink of the Premier League. If they don’t make it this time, watch out for them next season.

After a gruelling nine months, the final round of Championship matches takes place on Monday with all games kicking off at a reassuring 3.00pm. The pick of the day is arguably Millwall’s game with Blackburn who are both battling for one of the two play-off places still up for grabs. Other fixtures affecting play-off qualification see Preston hosting Sunderland and West Brom visiting Swansea. At the bottom, Reading, Blackpool and Wigan have taken their leave of this division. Replacing them will be Plymouth, Ipswich and one from Sheff Wed, Barnsley, Bolton, Derby and Peterborough. When did Plymouth last host Everton in a league game?

Replies - Newest Posts First (Show In Chronological Order)

El Scorchio 4:03 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
Yeah, I think some of Leicester's players have checked out already. They know they'll be elsewhere next season regardless.

The Ghost of Sven 3:41 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
Didnt see Leicester at Fulham but they should have lost to Everton and looked several levels below for commitment and determination
Lots of talent but the likes of Maddison & Tielemans are leaving whatever happens and dont seem THAT bothered.
Yesterday was a disaster for them and are on the verge
About time the Scousers do us a favour and finish them on Monday.
Ditto Newcastle at Leeds

Manuel 10:07 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
Not one draw this weekend, fence sitter. Funny though that last week Leicester v Everton you finally stuck your neck out on a close game and it was a draw. I bet you won't do that again :-)

Coffee 9:46 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
Calm down, dearie.

Manuel 5:12 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
swindon hammer 10:56 Mon May 8

''This ain’t over yet. Need at least another point at the very least.''


Fucking hell, can someone please make this stop. Utter fucking madness. Please stop it.

Ron Eff 1:30 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
No but they were 5-1 down and got it back to 5-3 purely by complacency on Fulham’s part. It might read better, but that absolutely was a drubbing, against a team with fuck all to play for.

onsideman 12:31 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
You don't need to give any examples Alex G... most of us aren't hard of thinking like pdcwhu

Ultimately, Leicester lost by 2 goals in a game in which they also missed a penalty. Hardly a complete drubbing. Not like Everton losing 4-1 at home and then taking 4 points from their next 2 including winning 5-1 away at European football chasing Brighton

Alex G 12:17 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
... run three on the bounce.

Alex G 12:17 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
pdcwhu 11:57 Mon May 8

I'm not sure what's wise, your attempts to be a tough man or the startling lack of intelligence in your posts.

I'm not sure why you think me talking about seven points means three wins. You do realise it's three points for a win and one for a draw?

And if you bothered to read the conversation I wasn't predicting Leicester would do it, I simply started that's what they needed to do to overtake us.

I can't be bothered looking up examples, but there have been plenty of time when clubs have been 'tonked' by two goals and then þ

fraser 12:17 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
He's just explained they wouldn't need to win three games two and a draw.. Not that it would happen, mathematically it's a fact though

pdcwhu 12:15 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
Offside boy....fuck off

onsideman 12:10 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football

pdcwhu 11:57 Mon May 8

Fuck me you're dense. It's like a battle of wits with an unarmed man

Any Old Iron 12:04 Tue May 9
Re: Saturday football
Another joke penalty. VAR is fucking toilet

pdcwhu 11:57 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
Alexg......Brain dead Cunt ...
How does a team win 3 in a Row after that Defeat you Fucking Idiot.....
Now Behave

Vexed 11:22 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
This Forest game is decent. Southampton getting back in it at 3-2. He's a bit a bland player overall but Waed-Prowse strikes a ball beautifully. I know everyone knows this but we'd score thousands if we had anyone that could shape a ball like that so consistently. Come on you saints.

happygilmore 11:21 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
don't know why, but I don't like this Notts Forest shower.

Wouldn't mind Southampton getting a draw. 3-2 now

onsideman 11:20 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
Ignore the troll Alex. He's probably pissed

Alex G 11:17 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
pdcwhu 11:10 Mon May 8

According to the table on the BBC Leicester's goal difference is currently -15 and ours -12.

If we lose all three of our games our goal difference will be at best -15 (worse if we lose by more than a goal).

If Leicester gets seven points their goal difference will be -13 (better if they win by more than one goal). Therefore they'd be level on points with us and definitely have a better goal difference.

Very, very simple maths that even a chemist can do. Please feel free to apologise for being the village idiot any time you like.

onsideman 11:15 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
He's a cheat that Johnson. Don't like the cunt

goose 11:14 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
The number of pens like the one at forest are ridiculous.
Attacking players know they just have to put their foot in the way and somehow they’re being fouled.

onsideman 11:13 Mon May 8
Re: Saturday football
Leicester wouldn't need to beat Liverpool and Newcastle to catch us. They could beat one and draw with the other and would go above us with a win in the final game

Unlikely Leeds could catch us. Everton and (assuming they go on to win tonight) Forest could.

I'm confident we're safe but no one would've had that 5-1 for Everton tonight so its nothing if not unpredictable

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